and i am gonna go!!!!

I v come to post here after a really long time….n somehow my life s quite eventful most of d time (n am glad it s)…so it leaves me vd an array of thoughts dt can be elaborated n penned down…some sensational n some usual…n right nw some really exciting occurrence in my life s my vision getting concrete….d vision I hd for myself!!! I dunno if its d right thing to do but now I really wanna do it…so it seems right..of course I v certain fears…n a few guilts too…after al..I am responsible for bringin d wave of change..getting instability…insecurities n uncertainties in d life of those attached but ds time if I don go I d b discontented always…my move is not making sense to most around me n I mean to ppl whose suggestion n ideas I value but ds time I don seem to give a damn…n am really sorry but I don’t!! u guys still matter to me but I know wat I want…infact I v never been ds sure about anything in my life…maybe ds s nt d right step…but yrs later I don wanna sit back wondering maybe I cud ve made it big. Maybe dere ws something better waitin to get explored bt I never made an effort. I v achieved wat I cud bein where I am..so its time to take dat leap…its time disconnect myself frm here n walk ahead. N as I say ds am filled vd d guilt of bein self-centered!!! Gawdd..ds s gonna b difficult!!!bt den as d famous sayin goes…nobody said its gonna b easy..dey jst promised it b worth it!!!

I feel blessed...

I v grown up believing that you are lucky if your frens treat u like family n ur family treats u like a friend n i v grown wiser realizing dat its true. d feeling of having a list of ppl to call wen u need just one is so gratifying..maybe i am blessed because i v such a list n its long. its not always easy to fulfill expectations ppl ve frm u...but its still amazing to know dat ppl ve such expectations frm u..that u r worth their expectations.
maybe i am thinkin too much..maybe everybody feels d same. i v been hurt too..i v felt miserable a lot of times..i v felt dejected by the same bunch of ppl. so does dat make me less blessed? maybe not...coz i still know i v dem..i can retaliate in my own way n ppl am talkin abt would still stay.no matter how far we are...no matter how long d gap has been, all dat s required to b back is a heartfelt 'hello'.

The first one...

i had been wanting to do this for quite some...n finalllly...@ 2:30 am...on a Monday morning...(after spending a lazy lazy sunday) am doing it...writing my blog!!!!!! In the big picture that u see for yourself, i v always seen myself writing some absolutely crazily creative stuff. Fortunately(read:unfortunately) my present job gave me the opportunity..so as to call it..to write..for a magazine. However, apart from giving me instant success with that "by line" (dats d editorial slang for publishing d name of the writer of the article) it also gave me jitters and fears. I always thot that there s no big deal about writing, after all i v always been my English teacher's favorite student. No matter how strict..no matter how bad she was but i was always d best of the lot. But so wrong i was about "writing". Anybody can write, but wat if nobody wants to read the S*** u v written. To write right is the key.
One n half year with this magazine..few articles..some reports..lot of write ups n i guess i am ready to write my blog. Not dat i think i am perfect or something but yea am definitely less fearful now..n a lil confident(dats d first thing i loose in a difficult situation).But am learning..n dats wat the title of my blog also says..Discovering..Learning and Growing!!
Anyways...its just the begining..hope to write some good stuff..n i mean real good..crazy..creative stuff!!
For now...shud just get goin...3:15 it s..a screwed day awaits!!
Adios!!